When dressing en femme, one of the most important things to remember when out is to act like a lady. After all, that is who we are presenting ourselves as to those around us. In this day and age with everyone having cameras on their phones, it’s all too easy to be caught in a less than lady-like pose. However, with little know-how, you’ll always be sure to look AND feel the part.

There are so many classic ladies to follow as good role models as well as some amazing women currently out there. The last thing anyone wants to become is the next Snooki. When we say lady, we are thinking more Audrey Hepburn.

Now you may ask us, “what does it mean to be a lady?” or “how do I act like a lady?”. Well, being a lady is something you should feel inside, but also present on the outside. Since you are already dressing, we know that that feeling inside is already there, so now it is just a matter of projecting yourself as that lady you’re looking to be.

Even if the term “lady” sounds like it is out of the 1800s, it is actually not outdated. Becoming a lady is something that requires commitment as it takes time to develop much of what goes into being a proper lady. It doesn’t mean you have to go to etiquette classes to learn which side of the table to put your fork and knife or which utensil to use for which dish, but we do want to present ourselves as classy when out en femme. Sure there are quite a few ‘naughty girls” out there and you know who you are, but sometimes even the naughty ones have to be tamed for certain occasions. With that being said, let crossdresslife help you out with some tips on acting like a lady.

Our top tips on how to behave like a lady

Be Polite

One of the most important tips we can give for acting like a lady is to always be polite. For example, when meeting someone new, a handshake along with a “pleasure to meet you,” is a great way to introduce yourself. “no thank you” “please” and “thank you” are polite responses a lady should use to respond to questions or offers. If you start using “nah” “nope” or “I’m good,” not only are you being curt with your responses, but you are also using terms a lot of guys would typically use.

Staying Knowledgeable

This is a big plus as well. Staying up to date on current events or even some light pop culture news is a great way to be able to hold a conversation with someone and also show that you are well informed of the world around you. Being educated is so much easier in this day and age due to the internet so there are no excuses here. It’s also never a bad idea to have a few topics in your mind that you are well versed in to show you are a lady who seeks knowledge as well.

Try to be Classy and Stylish

This is something which is important, but may not come naturally to some as it can be hard to choose outfit pieces that work well together. It’s a key tip for acting like a lady as you want to make sure you have a style that looks classy and well put together. There’s nothing wrong with looking a bit risque sexy or having some cute lingerie or outfits, but those should be worn behind closed doors either for yourself or that special someone. If you really want to add a touch of sex appeal to a sophisticated outfit, it is possible, but be clever. A low cut lacey top could still look classy with an oversized blazer over the top. We recommend taking a look on Pinterest for classy looks and then you can experiment with what’s in your wardrobe. A nice cocktail dress or a skirt and blouse combo show that you put thought into your look. Pencil skirts, midi skirts and longer dresses are good options, and you can add some accessories to bring out your look. Make sure your hair is nicely styled too. When it comes to makeup, try and not cake it on. As crossdressers, I understand we need a little extra help in the makeup category, but it is not impossible to have a nice natural look. Take a lesson with a makeup artist or watch some YouTube videos on proper application. With a nice outfit and makeup combo, you will let everyone around you know you’re a classy lady.

Lastly, make sure your outfit is clean and pressed. And make sure you are clean and pressed. That last part is a half-joke as being clean and having good hygiene is huge as no proper lady is going to go out looking haggard and smelly.

Try to Avoid Excessive Drinking or Smoking

For many, smoking is a definite no-no as a classy lady wouldn’t be sitting around with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth (not anymore anyway!). Alcohol is a little different. Sure if you are out at a party or dinner with some friends, you are going to have a few drinks. The key is to not do so excessively to the point you have made a spectacle of yourself. If you are to have a drink, try and have something ladylike, a martini or a glass of wine are great go to’s for example. The last thing you want to see is a woman with a Bud Lite bottle in one hand and a cigarette in the other.

Adopt Proper Posture

Acting like a lady can be incredibly enhanced with proper posture. Don’t slouch when you sit. Sit straight up. When you are walking, you should be doing the same. As men, it is very common to walk slouched, which is not good as a man either. But very rarely do you see a well put together lady slouching her way down the sidewalk or sitting in a chair like a lump. Straighten yourself out!

How to Behave Like a Lady when Dining Out

If you are out at a dinner party or restaurant, there are many key moments that will show where you sit in the lady category. Once again, always be polite – wait for everyone’s food to arrive before you start eating. If there is food out of reach, do not go across the table with your entire body to grab it, ask someone else at the table to “please pass the _____.”

If you need to leave the table for the bathroom, excuse yourself. Also, excuse yourself if you need to use your phone as texting or taking a phone call in the middle of a restaurant or dinner party is very rude. Lastly, order a meal that represents yourself as a lady. Giant hamburgers or other messy meals can be very difficult to eat without making a mess, so we recommend avoiding these kind of orders. Stick with something which can easily be picked up with a knife and fork without going everywhere. Salads, pasta dishes and baked dishes are often a good choice. If you are at someone’s house for dinner, make sure to compliment the food and be sure to thank the host/hostess for their invite and the great meal and company. Whatever you do, don’t go down the Real Housewife path at dinner!

Following these guidelines are great first steps to help you become a lady. As men dressing en femme, we have extra work to do. Even though we look and feel feminine, the overall presentation needs to be there for us to blend in when out. Even if you think it is old fashioned, a classy lady who presents herself well and acts with consideration and good manners around others is still one of the finest and sexiest things about being feminine. You will benefit so much from being a lady and it will make going out en femme that much more enjoyable. Good luck to all our ladies!

For some more information, Let us know your tips on acting like a lady over on our Facebook page.

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